Many young women, once they are engaged, usually go to a "kallah" class where they're supposed to learn the various halachos of niddah. Depending on who's teaching the class, the young women may also learn other tidbits such as which sex positions are allowed ("missionary"), acts that aren't (oral sex, male masturbation), and even what to think at the moment the man ejaculates.
How about enjoying yourself?
Unfortunately, the view of sex within the frum community has become rediculous and untenable. Sex needs to be taught and young couples need to understand that sexuality must be explored, together with a willing partner. How anyone can mandate what happens in the privacy of a couple's home is ludicrous. There is no "spilled seed" within a married couple's bedroom. Ther ought to be nothing off-limits.
Our rabbis teach us that sex is primarily for procreation. Why don't they also teach that sex is great recreation? Granted, Judaism places great emphasis on raising families - as it should. However, I maintain that many a failed marriage would have been altogther more successful had the newlyweds been granted "permission" to explore their sexuality together. I am willing to bet any amount that the vast majority of divorces take place because of sexual incompatibility. One partner wants to try something and the other is afraid to perpetrate an avairah. I say, as long as nobody gets hurt, why not?
If you don't think sex is a major issue, take a look at Craigslist or Shaindy.com. Otherwise frum Jews are starting to find ways to help themselves. If our rabbis don't step up to the challenge, the future won't be so bright.